Thursday, April 6

Heya,

Haven't gotten the chance to blog properly and all.

Well, I changed my blog address 'cos I wanted to vent everything, my feelings and all, and yet not take part in a blog war. The situation's fucked up already. Why aggravate it?

In the span of less than a week, actually, it was more like 2 days. I've seen the ugly sides of the people all closest to me. And truth is, at the rate this is going, I'll never be able to look at anyone the same again.

I thought things were gonna just return to normal. Hell, it's only a misunderstanding, you know? But well I guess I'm wrong. A simple miscommunication turned into this huge mess. No one's budging, no one's forgiving, no one's reconciling. Would it hurt to forgive someone after like what, 4 years of friendship? Or does my being a friend mean so little to you.

Seriously, I was really hurt. I couldn't comprehend what was happening at all. I didn't think it was such a big of a deal, until everyone became cold and unfeeling towards me. I lowered my pride and sent an email, apologizing and also explaining my side of the story, and also I understood their side. But I guess, nothing worked.

It's been almost a week now. I'm past the crying. I'm past the part where I think about it all the damned time. It affected me so damned much I cried 3 days in a row. I was half-dead at work, exhausted from crying/not sleeping enough/working late nights + long hours.

By tomorrow it'll finally be a week. I don't see it going very far. My heart's turned cold and it's affecting my life in ways it shouldn't. Your closests making you cry? Absurd. I'm never gonna forget that Friday, and how it'll forever serve me as a good reminder of why you shouldn't put so much trust in people.

I've learnt my lesson, and after all this, I'm gonna take what I now know and grow stronger. I never want to feel what I felt again.

Darling and I were just informed 3 days ago that we've finally earned the chance to go to HQ next month and take part in the Coffee Master Challenge, after which, we'll be taking Learning Coach. Tons of partners I know are going for Coffee Master. I seriously do not want this to affect work. I know I can do it. It's gonna take so much effort, but I know I've got it in me. I've never achieved anything in my entire life. I won't let anything get in the way.

I can just almost taste victory in my mouth.

Plus I just got a new camera. :) My eyecandy's now my baby.

No but seriously, now I've found out who I can always count on. She's always been there for me. Her shoulder to cry on, warm arms that'll hold me, and she'll always back me up.

I love you darling, :)
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